Tender Delicate Hope

My younger teenager is just starting her IB and working towards her exams in 2013.  That sounds like a long time to go, isn’t it?  I found out tonight she is already putting so much pressure on herself though it is more than 20 months away!   When she was twelve and was about to sit for a major exam, she was so stressed up.  But instead of studying she simply went cycling to de-stress.

This younger teenager is the happy go lucky one, giggling spontaneously and getting excited over small little things.  Anyone and anything in the entertainment world you want to know, just ask her.  She is the only one in the family who twits and had been sent to twitter jail – for twitting too much within a certain timeframe.

“Behold your body is your temple” – this is what she says all the time.  She takes extremely good care of herself pouring loads of lotion to moisturize herself.  If we are at the beach, it is sun-block complete with wide brim hats to match her swimwear.  Very health conscious and extremely active in sports.  Fashion is within her zone but she is mindful not to spend unnecessarily lavishly.

All the above are what one could observe of my younger teenager.  Unbeknown to most, she is also the more sensitive one.  Her tough exterior is more of a defence mechanism that she has put up in case she gets hurt, be it by comments passed or through actions of friends or loved ones.  Quick tempered but just as fast as it comes, it fizzles out just as quickly.  Her strongest strength is her determination.

There was an occasion where she took up my challenge to swim twenty laps non stop in an olympic size swimming pool in exchange for her very own Blackberry.  Not known to be a strong swimmer and had never completed swimming a lap without stopping, she took up my challenge.  She swam from early evening till the sun set.  For her determination in completing the challenge, she was rewarded with her very own Blackberry.

Tonight at our family dinner, we were all laughing and talking about stuff in general.  Out of the blue, the subject turn to studies and IB exams.  The mood at the table changed instantly just within the snap of a finger.  My younger teenager, the livewire of the family suddenly turned moody and broke down.  Such is the pressure she puts on herself to achieve good grades even though she is just one month into the IB two years.

The name, Nadia in Russian means "hope" or it can be a variant of Nadiyya which, in Arabic, means "moist, tender, delicate".

To me, my livewire is the tender delicate one.  Delicate to look at but also tough.  She reminds me of Lily of the Valley, an old-fashioned perennial that looks so delicate with its tiny bell shaped flowers but this hardy shady lover is anything but delicate! Lily of the Valley is a tough-as-nails perennial that can grow in the deep shade of large trees and shrubs.

Delicate but tough, my 'hope' is also the loyal to the end, she’s one to be by your side come what may.

I pray that that my “tender, delicate hope” will continue to grow even in the deep shade or large trees and shrubs like the Lily of the Valley.  Above all, not to forget continue to take the time to go cycling.

My "tender delicate hope"

Whatever you do and wherever you go,
I will continue to always whisper a prayer for you
Because I love you, always
~Mummy~

Zeta-omega-eta

In eight days, my little ballerina will leave the nest. She is looking forward to the new chapters in her life including dancing in the rain in her trenchcoat.

I remembered the first day day she sat for the IB exams.  She came to me and said

“Mummy please pray for me.”

To hear that, it truly warmth my heart.  I told my little ballerine “I’ll not only pray for you, I’d like to pray with you.”  Sitting for her university entrance exams was quite a daunting experience.  To know that she would reach out to me to pray with her just warmth my heart so. 

That day also brought me back to the day she heard the news of the demised of a terrorist.  Instead of joining her friends in chorus of jubilee and celebration, I remembered her clearly simply saying “No matter what, it was a death of a person.  I won’t want to rejoice in it.  I won’t rejoice in the death of someone even if he is my enemy.”

When she declared the above, she did not know of what Martin Luther King had said.  I told her that’s exactly what Martin Luther King said.  She celebrates life just as she has been named, Zoe.

The Greek word ‘zoe’ written 'zeta-omega-eta' is usually listed as meaning 'life'.  It can also mean 'a (means of) living', 'subsistence', 'goods' or 'property'.

There are times her stubbornness can drive me up the wall.  Many a time I have been exasperated by her oblivious to her surroundings, her lack of urgency and awareness of what is going on around her.

 

All in all though, I know she has a good head on her shoulders.  I am ready for her to leave the nest.  Soar my little ballerina, soar.

"I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives but I will not rejoice in the death of one, even an enemy."    

~~ Martin Luther King, Jr ~~

R & R

“Please go and write. You should rant, rave whatever on your blog.  You’ll feel better.”

 

The above is what my teenagers would tell me and this afternoon was no different.  I oft rant and rave to the man and my teenagers, if they are around, on issues that I feel strongly about.  My R&R, is the abbreviation for rant and rave – not rest and relax! 

When I get to R&R to my teenagers, that does not mean that they listen to me.  To my teenagers, my R&R is just me letting off my angst. 

They have long learnt earphones are their best friends!  They let me go on and on and on….. by now they are smart enough not to interrupt, they just go hmmm, yes, correct…..  Any contradiction to my views will only get me ranting more and non stop.  They’ll put on their earphones and I’ll just get on with my rantings.  Usually after I’m done, I’d feel much better and then we go down for snacks!

There was once when my sister called from Canada in the middle of my R&R.  She called at the wrong time! I felt sorry for her.  Instead of our normal sisterly conversation, I just plunged right in and told her what was going on, how I felt etc etc.  Poor sister – not that she is not used to this after our growing up years together – but to be caught in the middle of my R&R when she just called to talk……. well that’s what sister is for?

 

Today my family got me this book

They were like hawks looking at my reaction on receiving this book

Sorry to disappoint them, I look forward to reading the book!

A non too subtle hint in the book title?

A book I’ll enjoy reading nonetheless

ZP

On Wednesday, 17^th August 2011 ZP came into being. 

However I did not know of its existence until yesterday morning when I had received a call announcing the birth of ZP.  The person on the other end of the line asked that I go and collect ZP as soon as possible.  Two days to the deadline I’ve set for myself.   

 

Today one day to my deadline, I went to collect ZP and its birth certificate. 

I am so glad it is done.  ZP is officially here!

We all have our own life to pursue, our own kind of dream to be weaving.  And we all have some power to make wishes come true, as long as we keep believing.

~~  Louisa May  Alcott  ~~

Dream as if you’ll live forever, live as if you’ll die today.

~~  James Dean  ~~

Faith

I just have to write about this, to share this.

I am always humbled and amazed by God’s mercy and faithfulness.

I,for one am not the regular pious nor the typical well worded Christian.  Close friends and loved ones who know me well will testify that the way I swear can put a sailor to shame. A bad habit I have been trying to rein in and am still trying… and bad that I am, He has never ceased to bless me though as unworthy as I am.  Time and again, God has blessed me so where I can only give thanks and give back in return.

In this early hours of the morning, God has just answered my prayer in a most spectacular manner.  Don’t get me wrong.  There was no great white sparks, firecrackers, lightning bolts or bright lights from heaven.  Just in His simple way He gave me the answer that I have been seeking in prayers for the past few weeks.

  

In providing me with an answer to my prayers, He showed me in the most modern way possible - via skype! I found out how a beloved man made a courageous decision against all odds and norms.  Such a tremendous hard decision to make but this beloved man made the stand nevertheless after much prayers and with the support of his beloved wife and family.

 

With his wife sharing this confidential detail with me via skype, she did not know that I would be so blessed to witness such faith.  Simple faith simple step but yet it takes such a lot of courage and obedience.  When this beloved man and his family put their faith in God, they know that God will provide for them in His own way in His own time. 

I thank you for sharing with me.  I am very blessed by you and your family.  In turn I pray that you will continue to open up your hearts to Him and blessings that come along the way.  I dedicate this great hymn to you.  Much love always.

I love ME

We've just returned from a family dinner where food was fantastic and in abundance.  To me personally, when there are good food and good company, you do justice to it - you eat the food whilst enjoying the company.

There I was happily eating away and the man said it AGAIN - "You want to eat some more?!"  What did I do?  I looked at him and simply said "Yes".  What did you expect me to do especially if the kind host had offered some kind of mooncake that I have not tried before.  Of course I must not disappoint the host right?

Point taken - I did eat a lot but to imply in front of the family that I was eating too much and fat, hmmmm!  But do I care or was I sensitive that remark?  No.  Why, you may ask.  Well, herein lies the explanation .....

Most women when they look at themselves in the mirror they see these

As for me, when I look into the mirror, which I don't do a lot but when I do, this is what I see














Well, what can I say - I love me!
Am I fat?  Well I'd rather the term be overweight.
Am I in denial?  Of course I am.
What can I say - I LOVE ME!


On a serious note, however, I honestly believe that confession is good for the soul.  So here goes - yes, I do tend to over-eat and yes, I am overweight.  But I do love ME!  And because I love me,  I'll be good to me and not over-eat, but hey this is NOT a resolution, but merely a self check on my weight as my poor knees are bearing the brunt of the weight!  I don't like and can't go on a diet.  I am also too conservative to give these marvelous slimming potions and methods a chance.  So the only way for me is the good old fashion way - exercise.  In the meantime, yes

Tactless ads

I can’t help but feel disgusted with the public service announcements (PSA) brains or shall I say brainless who put up a controversial series of Ramadan commercials.  The PSAs suggested that non-Muslims refrain from certain behaviour while in public, urging them to “please understand and respect the significance of Ramadan”.

One of my friends rightly posted on his facebook “@AhmadIzhamOmar You have just insulted many of my Muslim friends with your ads implying they are so weak.”  Honestly Ahmad Izham Omar, why do you have to be so tactless intentionally and then retract the advertisements?  Why can’t you just think it through before releasing the advertisements?  The PSAs are demeaning to both the Muslims and non-Muslims alike.  

Just as Ahmad is so tactless, it is refreshing a read a young mind’s article wishing “for Malaysians to have more voice, to be respected and heard. I wish that the government would uphold the true essence of parliamentary democracy. I wish for the people to no longer fear and discriminate against each other, to see that we are one and the same.”

Food Treasure Hunt

I’ve always wondered what is it like to eat all my favourite dishes non stop, literally.  Well I found that out and experienced it first hand last Saturday.

The family was invited to join in a treasure hunt of a different kind – a food treasure hunt.  I got myself a ‘tent’ like blouse so I may eat as much as I could without my tummy showing herself in all her glory!  I was as ready as I can be.

The clue sheets consisted of only eating locations from Kuala Lumpur to Seremban to Port Dickson.  Whenever we had deciphered the clue and located the eating place(s), we were to order the recommended dish(es), eat it and go on to the next clue ie eating place.  Whilst the rest of the family members were the official members, I was the camera woman but the official biggest consumer!

 

Out of the nine eating clue locations in Kuala Lumpur, eight of them are my favourites!  Well I ate and ate a LOT!  Having completed the Kuala Lumpur circuit, we went on to Seremban.

 

 

Of all places, the organizers chose my favourite eating stalls in Seremban – hmmmmm did they plan to get me to increase my size to XXXXXL?  Seremban central market has some of the greatest eating stalls.  Amazingly one of the clue is my favourite of favourites – a stall that I have been patronizing for more than 30 years!  The beef noodles stall numbered 742 at Seremban central market is simply too good to resist.  Did I hesitate after eight dishes?  Of course not! 

 

Then it was a race to the finishing line.  By the time we reached the hotel to submit our answers, I was really really full.  Good news awaited us when we submited our answers and treasures.

We were surprised to be informed we were the first team to arrive.  A bonus to go with it - we scored full points!  How great can a weekend be?  Great eating spree with championship of food treasure hunt as icing on the cake!